Remember going to the circus as a child? Somewhere between the trapeze artists and the elephants, a lone performer would walk into the center of the ring carrying a large wooden crate. He would set the crate down, reach in and pull out a beautiful china plate, which he showed the audience.

People gasped. Anticipation rose. We knew what was coming next. He would hold up his index finger, set the plate on top of it, and give it a spin.

I was always so busy watching that first plate, I’d never notice where he got the broom handle, but suddenly, that plate was way up the in the air, balanced on that pole, spinning and spinning, faster and faster.

Pretty soon he had another one going, and then another, and another. He’d run back and forth, giving each plate another spin when it began to slow down and wobble.

He’d add still more plates, with more spinning, more running back and forth, to and fro, spinning, spinning, spinning. It was nerve-wracking to watch.

Do you ever feel like that performer? You have so many plates in the air, all spinning, some starting to wobble that you’re getting dizzy running back and forth, trying to keep them all going? I know I do.

Maybe it’s time to make a few changes. If we try to keep too many plates in the air, eventually, we won’t be able to keep up. Some of them will hit the ground and shatter into a million jagged pieces. We don’t want the casualties to be our most treasured china.

First, Prioritize

Which are the “platters” in your life, the really big, important plates? Spin those first. Some days, maybe the job platter will get a bigger push. Other days, the family one will. But be clear in your mind about what matters most in your life.

Then, Choose

Some of the smaller plates, like random time commitments you should not have made, groups you should not have joined, friendships that bring nothing but frustration, may need to be packed away. Some you’ll get out again someday. Others you won’t. But there isn’t a single one of us that can do everything.

And certainly not all at once.

When I watched that circus plate-spinner all those years ago, I noticed something interesting. At the beginning, when he only had a handful of plates going, he was laughing and skipping back and forth and enjoying keeping them all spinning. He didn’t get tense and anxious until he had more plates in the air than he could keep up with.

I think it’s time to pluck a few minor plates out of the air so I can give the really important ones the time and attention they deserve. Care to join me?

Happy Valentine’s Day! Though I love chocolate and roses as much as the next woman, I fully realize relationships and romance are about more than just one day. It may seem an unlikely source, but I’ve learned a lot about love from our dog:

No one is perfect

If you’ve been in a relationship for more than three minutes, you already know this. People say dumb things, do dumb things and sometimes make us completely crazy. But have you noticed that your dog (or cat) also does dumb, annoying things? So why do we cut our pets a lot more slack when they mess up than we do the people in our lives?

We are not guaranteed tomorrow

We’ve had our dog for 15 years and she is slowing down, much as we hate to see it. But she’s not the only one. So are many of the people we love. Life does not come with a guarantee. Make sure all your accounts are settled with those you love. Tell them you love them. Regret for things not said or done is a bitter pill you don’t want to have to swallow.

Perspective matters

My friend Tammy and I were talking about relationships one day. She said, “If you have a spotted dog, and all you look at are the spots, pretty soon, that’s all you see.” Hmmm. So if you have a husband/wife/child/parent/friend/pet that has faults (surprise!) and you focus only on those “problems,” before you know it, you won’t see anything but the things that make you nuts. The cure is to consciously, deliberately look for the good, the positive, the things that make you laugh. Those spots will gradually disappear. Love is about intentional blindness.

Be Affectionate

Have you noticed how Fido wags and wiggles and runs over to greet you when you come in the door? Why not do the same for your loved ones? (Well, maybe skip the tail wagging.) Throw off the restraint and welcome those you love with open arms and an open heart. Let them know how very glad you are to have them in your life.

That said, I’m off to make some phone calls and hand out some bear hugs.

Does this time of year make you feel a little…blah? Are you fighting that saggy, lethargic let’s-go-back-to-bed-and-try-this-again-tomorrow feeling? If so, you are not alone. Lots of factors, including dreary weather, leftover holiday weight gain and the beginning of a new year can weigh us down.

Try these four ways to beat the blues:

Exercise

I know, I know. When you feel like a slug, you don’t want to move. You want to curl up on the coach with a good book and 15 or 20 cupcakes. But exercise releases all those lovely feel-good hormones and helps bring back energy levels. To gain energy, you have to expend energy. It’s a bummer, but there it is.

Evaluate

Take a few minutes and do a quick inventory of your life. Doing this will help you pinpoint where the blues are coming from. Make a list of 7 areas: Financial, Career, Family, Physical, Social, Intellectual, Spiritual. On a scale of one to ten, rate how satisfied you are with each of these areas.

Pick the one with the lowest score and set a goal on how you can improve this area. It may mean sitting down with a spouse or boss and discussing ways to make things better. Simply taking action in one area of your life will help you feel more in control and less like a rowboat adrift in a storm.

Plan something

Sounds simple, right? If you can plan a vacation, do it. Not only does the actual getaway renew our energy, but the anticipation also helps rejuvenate us. We need new things–and things we enjoy doing–to look forward to. Even if you can’t escape for a week or more, plan a mini-getaway for a weekend. A friend of mine has a handicapped son and can’t get away for long periods. But she plans regular “play dates” with friends to get away for a day. Just being in new surroundings lifts our spirits and helps us renew our energy.

Count your blessings

It is easy to get overwhelmed by all that’s terrible in our world. Sometimes just reading the newspaper can make me cry. To combat all this negativity, jot another list, of all the things you’re thankful for. Be specific. And if you’re honest, the list will be longer than you expected. Just by looking for the good, you’ll be able to put the bad in perspective.

And when all else fails, eat chocolate. Somehow, that always lifts my spirits.

Those are my top ways to beat the winter blues. I’d love to hear yours…

Do you remember the old expression, “Make hay while the sun shines”? For Susana Cozea and the other families who live in the tiny town of Scrind, Romania, that is not just a saying; it’s smart living. Here in this small mountain village, hay is still cut and mounded by hand. If you try to do that too early in the day, you are asking for trouble, since everything is still damp. The time to cut the grass, spread it on the ground to dry, and mound it into haystacks is during the heat of the day.

Haystacks in Scrind, Romania

The day we visited Scrind, temperatures were well over 90 degrees. Susana and her husband, both in their seventies, were further up the mountain behind their house, hard at work. They graciously came in from the field to meet with us.

We were there to talk to the family, especially Susana, about the way their church has gotten involved in foreign mission work. Even though Scrind boasts a population of only 120 people, and only 10-12 attend the local church, their church helps support a Romanian family doing Bible translation work in Ethiopia. On the surface, this doesn’t seem possible. And yet, their church sends financial help to the Pascalau family every month.

Susana is one of the lay leaders in their church, and she lights up when she talks about the Pascalaus.  “Petru came to our church and talked about missions. We trusted him because we knew him. I was really happy someone from the region wanted to go. I was impressed he was taking the whole family. Translation is part of obeying the great commission—otherwise people can’t hear the gospel.”

She grinned and said, “If I were younger, I would have gone!”

Susanna Cozea (photo by Soren Kjeldgaard)

Instead, she reads the Pascalau’s newsletters in church and the church prays for them. Susana said, “I’m very happy to be a little part of this work. Can’t wait to hear the news, how the work is going. Then we know how to pray, how they’re doing. Knowing is important. Petru wrote that he needs a car, so the church is praying about that.”

In Ethiopia, because of taxes, even a 10-15 year-old car will cost $40,000 US. But Susana is confident that Petru will get a car.

Meeting Susana, seeing her twinkling eyes, her zest for life and her steadfast faith affected me on a heart level. She lives what she believes. And her willingness to get involved, even in the face of impossible odds, reminds me that when people work together for a common goal, big, impossible tasks become realities.

And big, impossible dreams come to life.

For more about how small churches are making a big difference, please go to: http://www.wycliffe.net/stories/tabid/67/Default.aspx?id=2486 (full version) or https://wycliffeusa.wordpress.com/2012/01/18/small-romanian-churches-make-a-big-difference/ (Shorter version)

Years ago I saw a sign at a doctor’s office that read:

All of our patients bring us joy. Some when they arrive; others when they leave.

Ouch. True though, isn’t it? Whether we are consciously aware of it or not, we affect those around us. Whether our sphere of influence is large or small, we make an impact on the people we come in contact with.

The big question is: how are we using that influence?

If someone interviewed your co-workers, what would they say about you? If you’re a writer, what do your stories say about you, your values, and your beliefs? If you’re an artist, what does your art reveal about the real you? What does the music you write and the songs you sing communicate about your heart?

At church on Sunday, Pastor Marty Shea said something that has been banging around in my brain. “The difference between influence, deception and manipulation is the motive and choice.”

That you and I will influence people is a given. But HOW we influence those around us is entirely up to us.

Lately, I’ve felt bombarded by negativism and all the yuck associated with political campaigns. As I head out today, I want to be someone who makes people smile, who offers encouragement, not criticism.

Take a moment to stop and think about how you can use your influence for good. The gospel of Matthew says, “You are the light of the world.”

In a dark and discouraging world, how can you have a positive impact on someone’s life today?

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about this idea of “success” lately and I stumbled across a great quote:

“Many people avoid discovering the secret of success because deep down they suspect the secret may be hard work.”

I admit I have been guilty of that kind of thinking. Instead of working on my current project, I’ll spend hours researching the latest tip, the newest trick, the current trend in achieving quick success.

But the reality is that most “overnight successes” were YEARS in the making. Every so often I’ll hear a speech where a successful writer blithely says, “Oh, I just sat down and wrote the story and the first publisher I sent it to, bought it.” Frankly, these kinds of stories make me grind my teeth. Because I’m jealous. I want quick and easy best-seller status in my world, too. Still waiting, thank you.

But the stories that make me stand up and cheer are the ones where a writer toiled and toiled and got enough rejection letters to wallpaper not just rooms, but entire houses, and then finally, finally found a publisher.

Those are the stories that inspire me. Because they achieved success the old-fashioned way:  they worked really, really hard for it.

In our get-rich-quick, entitlement-minded society, we’ve lost sight of the value of old-fashioned hard work. The kind where there are no excuses. No free handouts. Just tough, boring, nose-to-the-grindstone hard work.

It pays off. And the celebration is worth it!

I found a quote by Thomas Watson, Sr., founder of IBM. “If you want to increase your success rate, double your failure rate.”

Which boils down to one simple thing: more work. So that’s my plan this year. More writing. More submissions. Which will mean more rejections. But that’s okay.

I’ve found the secret ingredient to success.

Many of you know I had the privilege of traveling to Romania last summer as a writer for the Wycliffe News Network. I met so many wonderful people and had the privilege of hearing their incredible stories.

The stories that affected me most were the accounts of religious persecution and oppression under communism. I heard firsthand accounts from folks who risked their lives to smuggle Bibles. I came home with a new and profound appreciation for the religious freedoms I had previously taken for granted! (And a new determination to make sure those freedoms aren’t taken away.)

Brother Ghita Capota and his family were our hosts in the small town of Margau, Romania. (He and fellow church leader Brother Emil Inga are pictured in the photos.) They are lovely, gracious people who not only told us their stories, but opened their hearts and homes to us.

I’m very excited that the articles from our time in Romania are now available.

To read the full-length version of the article, Small Churches Can Make a Big Difference, please visit the Wycliffe Global Alliance Network site.

There is also a shorter version of the article available here:

If you have a minute, I hope you’ll read the stories–and check out some of the other articles on the sites as well.

And in case you missed any of the previous blogs about Romania, you can read Uncover the Hidden Mesh and Romania’s Gypsy Palaces, too.

May we never take our freedoms for granted. And may we never underestimate what incredible things a small group of dedicated people can accomplish .

It’s the third week of January and I don’t have my yearly goals written out or a plan in place to reach them. For a gal whose to-do list generally has its own to-do list, this is rather nerve-wracking, to say the least. Just thinking about it gives me heartburn.

But somehow, I haven’t been able to sit down and map out a master plan. Part of it is the niggling suspicion that the system I’ve been  using may not be working for me anymore.

When I pulled out last year’s goals, I realized I’d met almost none of them. And the schedule I’d set for myself had lasted about two weeks. But I had a fabulous year! Opportunities I’d dreamed of for years, but not planned for (like the writing trip with Wycliffe Global Alliance last summer) were amazing and incredible. But I can’t check them off my neatly articulated “goals” list.

I’ve read blogs and articles until I’m cross-eyed. Overall, the advice seems to fall into two camps: rigid goal setters/planners vs less structured productive-habit proponents.

I’ve been a card-carrying member of the first group for years and the rules are simple: set measurable, achievable goals and then divide your calendar into the steps/days/months needed to accomplish them. Then get busy.

The second group seems a bit more loose-y-goose-y–which my creative side really likes. Which is not to say this approach advocates laziness or “hoping things will happen.” There is a healthy block of self-discipline involved and it includes ways to measure progress, but this approach doesn’t require minute-by-minute scheduling. Basically, the idea is that if you change your life habits — like setting a daily word count or getting up an hour earlier each day–you will set yourself up to succeed.

Some argue that both approaches are really just differences in semantics, and maybe they are. But for anyone trying to accomplish some creative endeavor, we have to trick our minds into getting past the mental blocks and moving forward.

I think this year I’m going to try the second approach. I will incorporate some productive habits into my life and see where those take me.

What about you? How are you going to angle your life towards success?

This question gets tossed around a lot in various forms. Are you happily married? Are you happy in your job? Are you happy with your new car? Your dog? Your house? Were you happy with your hotel stay? Your meal at the restaurant?

We throw the question around lightly, and perhaps that’s as it should be. Happiness seems to be a fleeting emotion, as beautiful and temporary as a snowflake. On those increasingly rare occasion when my whole family gathers around the table and we laugh and tease and tell tall tales, my heart smiles. I’d say I’m happy at those moments. Extremely so. These slices of time are precious and I tuck them away in my heart because I know they pass too quickly.

But when someone cuts me off, or I get the cashier trainee–again–or I have to wait for the train en-route to work, I wouldn’t say I was “happy.” Now overall, would I say my life is more “happy” than not? Absolutely. But am I happy at every moment? Um, no.

Perhaps we need to dig a little deeper for the true meaning of happiness.

I found a quote by Helen Keller that I posted by my computer. She is somebody I would have loved to meet. Both blind and deaf, this tough lady overcame incredible odds and accomplished great things. Her courage, grit and determination inspire me. Here’s what she had to say about happiness:

“Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification, but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.”

Now that’s a mindset you can sink your life into. That’s where bone-deep contentment arises, the stuff that’s unaffected by the winds of circumstance. Happiness comes from loyalty and devotion to a worthy purpose.

So, are you happy? To what worthwhile purpose are you devoting your life?

If just hearing names like Rockefeller, Astor, Morgan, Vanderbilt and Macy make you long to travel backwards to a more elegant time, you’ll love Jekyll Island. This small island off the Georgia coast was once home of the famous “Millionaires Club” where some society’s wealthiest families spent their winter months.

Back then, the Island was accessible only by boat–or yacht, as it were–though today there is a causeway for easier access. The Jekyll Island Club’s initial group of 53
members/investors included people like Marshall Field, Henry Hyde, J.P. Morgan,
Joseph Pulitzer and William K. Vanderbilt. The Queen Anne style Clubhouse first
opened its doors in 1888 and members competed to see who would arrive in the
biggest yacht.

The hotel’s rich history captivated me and inspired my Christmas novella, The Christmas Gift, so I set Will and Sophie’s story on Jekyll Island. I used a bit of creative license since the season generally began after Christmas, but 1942 was in fact, the Club’s last official season.

Today the Jekyll Island Club is a historic hotel and it’s no less impressive than it was then. Rich paneling, high ceilings, elegant antiques. It’s hard not to gawk. You feel glamorous just walking down the thick runners carpeting the halls. (For more on the hotel, go to http://www.jekyllclub.com/)

Jekyll Island Club Hotel, GA

If you visit the Island, be sure to cruise past the other “Cottages” built by the club members. Their definition of “Cottage” was clearly different than mine. These are mansions, pure and simple. Instead of walking or driving, you can rent a bicycle or take a horse drawn carriage tour past the homes. The Jekyll Island  Museum also offers a guided tram tour.

DriftwoodBeach

On the north end of the island, not far from the fishing pier is Driftwood Beach,
one of my favorite places on Jekyll. We headed there out of curiosity and found
a lovely, unspoiled (though windy!) corner of the island to explore.

Driftwood Beach, Jekyll Island, GA

There are other hotels on Jekyll Island, some right on the beach, and there are myriad things to do, from shopping in the historic district, visiting the Georgia Sea Turtle Center and the Jekyll Island Museum, to playing at the water park in the summer. For more info, go to: http://www.jekyllisland.com/Home.aspx

Whether real or virtual, enjoy your visit to the “Gilded Age.”